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Updated for 2008:
http://mcsweeneys.net/2008/11/20tucker.html
"Damn it, Dagny! I need the government to get out of
the way and let me do my job!"
She sat across the desk from him. She appeared casual
but confident, a slim body with rounded shoulders like
an exquisitely engineered truss. How he hated his
debased need for her, he who loathed self-sacrifice
but would give up everything he valued to get in her
pants ... Did she know?
"I heard the thugs in Washington were trying to take
your Rearden metal at the point of a gun," she said.
"Don't let them, Hank. With your advanced alloy and
my high-tech railroad, we'll revitalize our country's
failing infrastructure and make big, virtuous profits."
"Oh, no, I got out of that suckers' game. I now run
my own hedge-fund firm, Rearden Capital Management."
"What?"
He stood and adjusted his suit jacket so that his
body didn't betray his shameful weakness. He walked
toward her and sat informally on the edge of her
desk. "Why make a product when you can make dollars?
Right this second, I'm earning millions in interest
off money I don't even have."
He gestured to his floor-to-ceiling windows, a
symbol of his productive ability and goodness.
"There's a whole world out there of byzantine
financial products just waiting to be invented,
Dagny. Let the leeches run my factories into the
ground! I hope they do! I've taken out more insurance
on a single Rearden Steel bond than the entire
company is even worth! When my old company finally
tanks, I'll make a cool $877 million."
Their eyes locked with an intensity she was only
beginning to understand. Yes, Hank ... claim me ...
If we're to win the battle against the leeches, we
must get it on ... right now ... Don't let them
torture us for our happiness ... or our billions.
He tore his eyes away.
"I can't. Sex is base and vile!"
"No, it's an expression of our highest values and
our admiration for each other's minds."
"Your mind gives me the biggest boner, Dagny
Taggart."
He fell upon her like a savage, wielding his mouth
like a machete, and in the pleasure she took from
him her body became an extension of her quarterly
earnings report-proof of her worthiness as a lover.
His hard-on was sanction enough.
"Scream your secret passions, Hank Rearden!"
"Derivatives!"
"Yes!"
"Credit-default swaps!"
"Oh, yes! Yes!"
"Collateralized debt obligation."
"YES! YES! YES!"
On Nov 29, 2:22 pm, "Clave" <C...@c...com>
wrote:
>
Wow. That's great.
On Nov 29, 12:22 am, "Clave" <C...@c...com>
wrote:
> Updated for 2008:
>
> http://mcsweeneys.net/2008/11/20tucker.html
>
> "Damn it, Dagny!
Oh. My. Fucking. God.
Genius!
.-=d00b
On Nov 29, 6:21 am, p...@g...com wrote:
> On Nov 29, 2:22 pm, "Clave" <C...@c...com>
> wrote:
>
>
>
> Wow. That's great.
Apparently to you, "Jack-n-Jill" is advanced reading
Hey Clave, see below for some suggestions for changes....
On Fri, 28 Nov 2008, Clave wrote:
> Date: Fri, 28 Nov 2008 22:22:10 -0800
> From: Clave <C...@c...com>
> Newsgroups: alt.politics, alt.politics.economics, misc.invest.stocks
> Subject: Atlas Shrugged Redux
>
> Updated for 2008:
>
> http://mcsweeneys.net/2008/11/20tucker.html
>
> "Damn it, Dagny! I need the government to get out of
> the way and let me do my job!"
>
> She sat across the desk from him. She appeared casual
> but confident, a slim body with rounded shoulders like
> an exquisitely engineered truss. How he hated his
> debased need for her, he who loathed self-sacrifice
> but would give up everything he valued to get in her
> pants ... Did she know?
>
> "I heard the thugs in Washington were trying to take
> your Rearden metal at the point of a gun," she said.
> "Don't let them, Hank. With your advanced alloy and
> my high-tech railroad, we'll revitalize our country's
> failing infrastructure and make big, virtuous profits."
>
> "Oh, no, I got out of that suckers' game. I now run
> my own hedge-fund firm, Rearden Capital Management."
>
> "What?"
>
> He stood and adjusted his suit jacket so that his
> body didn't betray his shameful weakness. He walked
> toward her and sat informally on the edge of her
> desk. "Why make a product when you can make dollars?
> Right this second, I'm earning millions in interest
> off money I don't even have."
Why not get something in here about self-disbursement of stock option
grants, and backdating them? Accounting fraud? Sweet deals with BoDs?
Management-led LBOs?
> He gestured to his floor-to-ceiling windows, a
> symbol of his productive ability and goodness.
>
> "There's a whole world out there of byzantine
> financial products just waiting to be invented,
> Dagny. Let the leeches run my factories into the
> ground! I hope they do! I've taken out more insurance
> on a single Rearden Steel bond than the entire
> company is even worth! When my old company finally
> tanks, I'll make a cool $877 million."
How about getting in something on lobbyists pandering to govt for
more corporate welfare, corporate tax breaks, relax regulations, etc.
> Their eyes locked with an intensity she was only
> beginning to understand. Yes, Hank ... claim me ...
> If we're to win the battle against the leeches, we
> must get it on ... right now ... Don't let them
> torture us for our happiness ... or our billions.
>
> He tore his eyes away.
>
> "I can't. Sex is base and vile!"
Take out this prudish hangup. We're all liberated these days and it just
delays the fun.
> "No, it's an expression of our highest values and
> our admiration for each other's minds."
The money/power theme needs to be developed as an aphrodisiac.
"minds"? Where? I thought capitalism was about materialism, greed, etc.?
> "Your mind gives me the biggest boner, Dagny
> Taggart."
>
> He fell upon her like a savage, wielding his mouth
> like a machete,
^^^^^^^
violin fiddle? Needs more finesse. More erotic word. Something else?
and in the pleasure she took from
> him her body became an extension of her quarterly
> earnings report-proof of her worthiness as a lover.
> His hard-on was sanction enough.
You need some kind of overhead fireworks "skyrockets in the stratosphere"
complete with little sparkling stars, falling back to earth, in the middle
of which are little dollar signs, blinking on and off, some in neon signs,
some glow in the dark.
> "Scream your secret passions, Hank Rearden!"
Need some indication that everything is vibrating, pictures are falling
off the wall, cabinets falling over, vibration everywhere...like about 7
on the Richter scale from the orgasms.
> "Derivatives!"
>
> "Yes!"
8 on the Richter scale.
> "Credit-default swaps!"
>
> "Oh, yes! Yes!"
9 on the Richter scale.
> "Collateralized debt obligation."
>
> "YES! YES! YES!"
Bed collapses (unless they're 'doing it' on the floor), pillows and sheets
and clothes flying in all directions, all surrounding
walls are crumbling, bridges collapsing, utility companies
go up in smoke, telephones don't work any more....etc....lightning and
thunder in the distance.....
Grand finallie: Great Depression(?)
Alternate ending sub-themes: Midas touch (can't eat the stuff), Silas
Marner? Scrooge?
with left wing kooks, the dumber it it, the more they admire it, hence
their fasination with islama obama...hahahhahahhaha
DISOBEY !
On Nov 29, 8:23 am, Doobie Keebler <k...@g...com> wrote:
Yeah they even have a chapter on our own John Galt (who is John Galt?)
who sometimes posts here!
Reproduced below.
A.S.
There was still the breathless tone in her voice when she asked, "The
financial strategy ... the financial strategy I found ... it was you
who made it?"
"Yes," he said.
John Galt's face betrayed no signs of pain or fear or guilt, and his
body had the clean tensile strength of a foundry casting with skin the
color of a polished full-port brass valve. In the center of this
secret mountain valley where the titans of Wall Street had retreated
for an extended junket was a 3-foot-tall dollar sign of pure gold atop
a granite column. It was tacky, yes, but it was also their emblem, a
symbol of their triumph.
"But why did you leave it behind?"
"Because once I committed the plan to memory I no longer needed it."
"I don't understand."
"The capital-gains tax, Dagny," Galt said. "We loathe it."
He pointed to the houses of men she knew, and the names sounded like
the richest stock market in the world--a roll call of honor.
"Our money represents our spirit's values," Galt said. "When the
government takes our profits, it is literally robbing us of our souls.
I will not apologize for my wealth to a nation of looters. We who live
by the mind could've been engineers, scientists, doctors, extreme-
sports enthusiasts, but there is no purer pursuit than the pursuit of
money. A is A. Money begets more money, and ..."
Galt went on like this for what seemed to Dagny like hours, until,
finally, something he said piqued her interest.
"And that's why I created the financial plan you found. It's true, it
works. But it is not sustainable. It will ruin this country's
financial system, and then we'll see how those who despise us prosper
when their lenders and investors refuse to invest or lend." He laughed
joylessly. "Funny, isn't it? I must destroy the very thing I love in
order to save it."
"Just to avoid paying taxes?"
"I do not compromise my beliefs, and I will kill anyone who asks me
to!"
A silence fell between them, and it was awkward.
Finally, Dagny asked, "So, just out of curiosity, how much are you
worth?"
He shrugged. "What is infinity?"
She let out a rich, powerful moan, like the sound of a passing diesel
train in the night.
On Nov 29, 2:55 pm, c...@w...net wrote:
> with left wing kooks, the dumber it it, the more they admire it, hence
> their fasination with islama obama...hahahhahahhaha
>
> DISOBEY !
Comix, STFU and pay attention: you might actually learn something.
The story is a PARODY of 'Atlas Shrugged' by Ayn Rand.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atlas_Shrugged
Those of us who've actually bothered to <i> read</i> Rand recognize in
this parody her sophomoric style and unrelenting shrillness.
<wiki snip> . . .Ayn Rand was a Russian-born American novelist,
philosopher, playwright and screenwriter. She is widely known for her
best-selling novels The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged, and for
developing a philosophical system called Objectivism.
. . . Rand advocated rational individualism and laissez-faire
capitalism, categorically rejecting socialism, altruism, and religion.
Her ideas remain both influential and controversial.
Rand described herself as a "romantic realist", and if she understood
that to be an oxymoron she didn't let on.
Even today there are more than a few Libertarians and Conservatives
who lean towards Objectivism, and this parody is a thumb-in-the-eye to
them, and to all Free Market True Believers.
"My philosophy, in essence, is the concept of man as a heroic being,
with his own happiness as the moral purpose of his life, with
productive achievement as his noblest activity, and reason as his only
absolute."
-- Ayn Rand
Paging Mr. Galt. . . Mr. John Galt . . . put down that drumstick and
weigh in on this one!
.-=d00b
.
On Nov 29, 11:41 pm, Ayatollah Obama
<o...@g...com> wrote:
> On Nov 29, 6:21 am, p...@g...com wrote:
>
> > On Nov 29, 2:22 pm, "Clave" <C...@c...com>
> > wrote:
>
> > Wow. That's great.
>
> Apparently to you, "Jack-n-Jill" is advanced reading
Wassamatta, Ayatollah? Somebody go nasty wee wee on your idol?
i repeat, the dumber the subject is, the more interested the left wing
kooks are in it....hahhahahhahahha
DISOBEY !
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